Film, Thoughts

I Am Michael Fassbender…

… and I’m in everything.

I first won the attention of critics in Steve McQueen’s (no, not the dead one) Hunger in 2008 and then started my snowballing run of success with Quentin Tarantino’s (definitely not dead) Inglourious Basterds. It’s evident that we have some serious home-grown talent mugging it out in Hollywood – that’s me by the way. Not McQueen. I can be found on your screens right now in Shame (also Steve McQueen, still not the dead one), providing my unique command of the screen and very impressive acting skills.

What’s so arresting about me, a handsome and talented thesp? Is it my sunken eyes, my immaculate hair, or does my artistic brilliance just shine out of my perfectly toned butt? I’m not one to blow my own trumpet, but I was definitely the best Magneto (move over McKellen) and my penis has so much screen time in Shame, it’s cited in the credits with its own role.

See me on a thirty-foot screen in Prometheus this summer.

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About GaryGreenScreen

Freelance film critic.

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Gary Green: Freelance film critic.

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